Well, let’s talk about this Bryce Harper fella, you know, the baseball player. Folks are always yappin’ about him, so I figured I’d chime in.
Bryce Harper, that baseball whacker
First off, they say he’s a Mormon. Now, I ain’t no expert on them Mormons, but it seems like he’s a real serious one. They say he writes somethin’ called “Luke 1:37” on all them autographs he signs. Some bible stuff, I reckon. Says somethin’ ’bout God, like “nothin’s impossible with God.” Sounds mighty religious to me. He plays for the Washington Nationals, or maybe it’s the Phillies now? Hard to keep track of these things, you know. All them teams movin’ around.
He’s a hitter, that’s for sure
This Harper fella, he can sure hit that ball. They say he’s smacked a whole mess of home runs, over 300 they say. That’s a lot of whacks, even I can figure that out. Been playin’ for years, too, over a dozen, I heard. Seems like he’s pretty good at what he does. Makes a lotta money, I bet. More money than I’d ever see in my life, that’s for darn sure.
- He hits the ball real far.
- Plays for some big teams.
- Makes a whole heap of money.
Got beaned by a pitch, poor fella
Heard tell he got hit by a pitch the other day, right on the elbow. Ouch! That gotta hurt. They took him outta the game, but he said he was alright. Tough fella, I guess. Gotta be tough to play that baseball. Them balls come flyin’ at ya fast, I seen it on the TV once. Dangerous game, if you ask me.
Started young, that Harper boy
They say he started playin’ when he was just a little tyke. Three years old, can you believe it? Playin’ against kids twice his age. His daddy taught him good, throwin’ sunflower seeds and bottle caps for him to hit. That’s one way to do it, I suppose. My grandpappy used to make us hit rocks with a stick, but that’s another story. Anyway, this Harper fella, he was a natural from the get-go, seems like.
Got himself a whole family now
And now, I hear tell he’s got a whole bunch of kids. Three of ’em, they say. A regular family man, I guess. Good for him. Family’s important, ya know. More important than hittin’ baseballs, if you ask me. But I ain’t him, so what do I know?
Bryce Harper the Mormon baseball star
So, there you have it. Bryce Harper. A Mormon baseball player who hits the ball real far, got beaned by a pitch, started young, and has a whole bunch of kids. He’s a famous fella, that’s for sure. Folks like to talk about him. And now I done talked about him too. What else is there to say? He plays baseball, he’s a Mormon, and he makes a lot of money. That’s about the size of it. Hope that clears things up for ya.
More about that Mormon stuff
Now, some folks might not know what a Mormon is. Like I said, I ain’t no expert, but they got their own churches and their own ways of doin’ things. And this Harper fella, he seems real committed to it. Wants to be the “best walking Book of Mormon,” they say he said. That’s somethin’, ain’t it? Shows he takes his religion real serious. More power to him, I say. Everyone’s gotta believe in somethin’.
He’s good at baseball, and that’s that
At the end of the day, he’s a baseball player. A darn good one, from what I hear. Hits them home runs and makes the fans cheer. And he’s a family man. And he’s got that Mormon thing goin’ on. That’s Bryce Harper in a nutshell, I reckon. Not much more to it than that. He plays ball, he prays, and he raises his kids. Seems like a decent enough fella, even if he does make more money than I can even imagine. Well, that’s all I got to say about Bryce Harper. Hope it was useful, or at least entertainin’.
