Alright, alright, lemme tell ya ’bout this wrestling show, this…SmackDown thing. I dunno what half the stuff means, but I watched it, so here’s the deal, like that Bleacher Report thing does.
First off, they had this fight, a bunch of fellas smackin’ each other around. Looked like a real barn burner, they was callin’ it… WarGames? Sounded fancy, but it was just a big ol’ mess of fists and feet. I give it a solid B, you know? Not the best I’ve seen, but not the worst neither. Them boys was sweatin’, that’s for sure.
- One fella, real big, like a bull, he was huffin’ and puffin’.
- Another one, skinny little fella, he was jumpin’ around like a flea on a hot skillet.
Then they had these girls, wrestlin’ too. They was fightin’ for some belts, somethin’ shiny. I guess they lost last time, so they was real mad. They put up a good fight, I gotta say. Lots of slaps and hair pullin’. Reminded me of them chickens back on the farm, always peckin’ at each other. I’d give it a C+, them girls tried hard, real hard.
They kept talkin’ ’bout some “Bash in Berlin” thing. Sounds like a party, but I bet it’s just more fightin’. These fellas, they never get tired, always wantin’ to punch somethin’. Maybe they need to go chop some wood or somethin’, get that anger out in a useful way. But, no, they just keep smackin’ each other. Well, that’s their business, I guess.
This Bleacher Report fella, he says he looks at this stuff real close, gives it grades, like a teacher. I dunno about all that. I just watch it, see who wins. But I guess someone’s gotta make sense of it all. He’s talkin’ ’bout “analysis” and “recaps”. Sounds like fancy words for watchin’ and then tellin’ folks what happened. He gave some matches As and Bs, some Cs. I think he’s pretty generous, some of them fights was just plain silly.
One time, they was fightin’ in this… “Delta Center” place. Sounded big. Lots of lights and noise. I bet them folks payin’ good money to watch these fellas beat each other up. I could do that for free back home, just yell at the kids to wrestle, ha! This fight, it was alright. Some good moves, some not-so-good moves. I’d give it a B-, maybe a C+, depends on how I’m feelin’ that day. It’s all just entertainment, I suppose, like them soap operas on the TV, only with more muscles and less cryin’.
Then there’s this “Hell in a Cell” thing. Sounds scary, right? It’s just a big cage, they put them fellas in. No way to run, just gotta fight. Kinda like a chicken coop, but with more violence. This one, it was serious. Them fellas was really goin’ at it. Blood and sweat, all over the place. I give that one an A-, yeah, a real good fight, even if it was a bit much for my old eyes. They was usin’ chairs and ladders, and all sorts of things. I kept thinkin’, “Someone’s gonna get hurt real bad.” But I guess that’s the point, right?
Anyways, that’s the SmackDown for ya. Lots of fightin’, lots of yellin’. I don’t get it all, but it’s somethin’ to watch, somethin’ to pass the time. Better than lookin’ at the corn grow, that’s for sure. And them fellas on Bleacher Report, they seem to know what they’re talkin’ about, even if they use them big words. They give it grades, I give it a watch. That’s how it works, I reckon.
So, overall, the show was okay. Some good, some bad, some just plain weird. But that’s wrestling for ya, ain’t it? Just a bunch of grown-up folks playin’ fight. And folks like me, we watch it. Don’t know why, but we do. Maybe it’s the excitement, maybe it’s the noise, maybe it’s just somethin’ to do when the chores are done.
One more thing, these fellas they are strong. They throw each other around like ragdolls. It’s amazin’ what the human body can do, I tell ya. Makes my old bones ache just watchin’ them. But hey, they get paid for it, so I guess it’s worth it. They seem to enjoy it, most of the time. And the crowd, they sure do love it. Cheerin’ and booing, it’s all part of the show.
Tags: [WWE, SmackDown, Bleacher Report, Wrestling, WarGames, Bash in Berlin, Hell in a Cell, Grades, Review, Analysis]
